Cabin Fever

I has it. And with me not leaving the state of CA for another month I am not sure how I am going to manage. I still have no work and have not heard from any of the jobs I have previously applied for, in terms of a job I can do to tide me over til I get to AZ. It is very hard for me to stay here with nothing to show for it. No money, no job, nothing to do and in the end nothing to help me with my transition except for money that I have to borrow from the in-laws.

I have said many times that I am grateful for the help that they have given us while we were here in CA, but there comes a point where a man has to stand on his own two feet and be able to support his family without support from others. I am not saying that if we fall on hard times we are made to suffer, but there comes a point where a man has ot exist on his own or there is no point to existing. Not to mention it is not fair to my wife and daughter for us to have to live like this. If I can not provide for them then who am I?

I know it is only a matter of thirty days, but that is a long time when you have nothing to hold you over. I am trying to think of a way to make some money to hold me over, but it seems impossible to do from this state. It is just so hard to be on he brink of something great when you are forced to wait for the chips to fall into place. I’m trying to be patient, I really am, it’s just that I want my family to be supported and happy, that is my primary concern.

Well, I guess at this point, that is all I can do, wait and pray, Fiat Voluntas Tua.


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